You’re Probably Less Self-Aware Than You Think

Mirror Mirror: Most of us assume we know ourselves pretty well. But research suggests that about 95% of people believe they’re self-aware while only around 12% actually are. And the people most confident in their self-awareness tend to be the least accurate about it. Part of the problem is that we keep inconvenient truths just outside our line of vision, which makes it harder to follow through on the habits we want to solidify. Fortunately, self-awareness is like a muscle, and there are ways to make it stronger.

How to Do It: The most practical starting point is tracking your behaviors. People who monitor what they’re eating or how they’re sleeping consistently report being surprised by their own patterns. When you catch yourself falling short of where you want to be, it helps to lean into self-compassion rather than self-criticism. People higher in self-compassion reportedly show lower stress and greater resilience. So try swapping “why” questions for “what” questions. “What’s getting in my way?” generates actual insight. “Why can’t I do this?” mostly makes you spiral.

The Benefits: People with stronger self-awareness report higher levels of happiness and self-esteem and are more motivated to change their habits.