Good Advice Is a Skill — Not a Gift
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People often treat “being good at giving advice” like a natural talent. It isn’t. With practice, you can get better at it — and it’s worth the effort. Strong relationships are one of the biggest levers for health and well-being, and the way we give advice can either strengthen those bonds or strain them.
Why it Matters:
Unsolicited advice often lands as criticism and can erode trust at home and at work. But when someone asks for advice, the same guidance feels more useful and respectful — and people are more likely to act on it.
How to Do It: There are a basic set of research-backed principles to follow in order to give better advice. Some key ones include:
– Look Before You Leap: Before you offer advice, ask if someone actually wants it.
– Ask Before You Answer: Don’t assume you have the full picture — ask questions to get a better understanding of their position.
– Mirror, Don’t Project: Don’t just refer back to your own experience. Put yourself in their shoes and orient your advice toward their goals.
If you want to go even deeper, Harvard Business Review has an even more detailed set of frameworks to apply in order to give, and get, great advice.
